I’m not better than anyone else . . .

but no one is better than me!”

In my last blog article I wrote about the first part of our dojo training theme “I’m not better than anyone else . . .”  (Remember it was about modesty and humility?)  This week I get to explain the even more powerful second half of this sentence so you can share this with your child – on the ride home!

There are three important aspects to “. . . but no one is better than me!”

1. This first one is pretty obvious. A key to success and a characteristic of all black belts is confidence in the face of self-doubt, fear, failure or hardship. We often use the saying, ”To do anything worthwhile in life, will be hard and take time. The only way you can consistently succeed is to have the ability to sustain your drive, energy and attitude. Never stopping until you succeed in achieving your goals!

2.  The second one is a sneaky one. Without really knowing it, many people are lulled to sleep in life. They go through most of their life settling for good enough, average or mediocre? It is easy to see why. Society tells us to fit in! Don’t rock the boat! When an employee or student starts to work hard and excel her peers say, “What are you doing?! You are going to make us look bad?!” So from a very early age we are rewarded for fitting in and staying average. Not at this dojo. We push our students to go outside their zones of comfort to achieve their greatest potential.

3. The third one is, sticking with things we think we are passionate about. We have ruined a generation by giving them some bad advice on life and success - At 25 or 30 they are following their passion right to their parent’s basement! The reason why? They have it all backwards! Passion is not what comes first. First you work really hard on something. Then you get really, really good at it. Then you fall in love with it. Then finally the passion is found.

The secret to success? Don’t become a dabbler, especially in your 20’s! It starts when you are young.

It is easy to spot the dabblers. When they are young they try a lot of different sports or activities but never stick with any of them. Later in college they change majors a dozen times. They often have difficulty staying in a committed long term relationship. When they enter the working world they cannot hold a job. Help your child stick with one or two things early, work hard for a long time, and become the best . . . !

“Prepare the Child for the Road, not the Road for the Child.”

Sensei